Lessons from Strangers (Part 1) . . . You're Beautiful!

Meeting him was like a breath of fresh air.

I hadn't dealt with many guys like him. Most of the time, dudes act like all we (females) wanna hear is, "Hey ma. . . (hey sexy, or what up shorty)" but he simply said, "Hello." He was warm and hilarious- willing to embarrass himself in the grocery store just so he could keep talking to me. Before we went our separate ways, he'd asked me out.

Talking to him was easy! If there's one thing that girls love, it's being able to have a great conversation with a guy. He amazed me with his knowledge of statistics and a desire to analyze almost everything. He was easygoing and fun to be around. He really wanted to know about ME- who I was, what I'd studied in college and what interested me. . .

And he didn't mind giving out compliments ;-).

Our meal together was bittersweet.  Like I said, talking to him was easy. Hours passed during our conversations on the phone and in person. We kept each other laughing and both like[d] to ask questions.

We gave quick and honest answers. . . After a while, we realized that a relationship wouldn't work with us but he was still a gentleman. He let me know that he believed I was a beautiful and classy woman- deserving of a nice afternoon with no strings attached. "I'm not expecting anything from you. You don't owe me. . . I'm paying for this and I just want you to have a good time."

Who does that?! :-)

I don't feel like my time was wasted because I really learned a lot. I was encouraged by our meeting- our interaction.

Here are some of the things that he taught/reminded me. . .

1) Sometimes less really is more. Days before meeting him, I was talking to my god-sister about trying to figure out what guys were looking for. She was saying that while many females are ready to shell out hundreds of dollars on hair weave and makeup, a lot of guys are drawn to the girls who go the more natural route. He reinforced that. One of the reasons that he told me he thought I was beautiful was because I "had a natural look" and "nothing seemed fake" about me. Hmm. . .

2) Insecurities are real but we don't have to feed them. 
Insecurity- n. Uncertainty or anxiety about oneself; Lack of confidence
We waste so much time worrying about things that we're afraid people will think of or notice about us. We should focus more on being our authentic selves. The people who deserve your time and energy will see and appreciate you for just being YOU! *I have a birthmark under my right eye and I've had a gap since I was in elementary school. I think about these things all of the time but to him, I was simply gorgeous- inside and out.*

3) We teach guys how to treat us! This may sound like common sense but my father loves to say, "If sense were so common everyone would have (and use) it!" Ladies. . . please don't be so excited to "talk" to a guy that you just take whatever is handed to you. Set boundaries- whether that's literal or figurative. Personally, I try to be very conscious of the time that I'm on the phone. Everybody has their preference. . . Sometimes when I'm having a really good conversation, I may find myself still talking late into the night but you will NOT hear of me accepting calls at {what I refer to as} booty-call hours. Whether it's the time of day that they call or the way that they speak to you, you need to make your comfort number one. If you're not cool with something, speak up! The guy who deserves you will respect you for having standards!

4) If a guy is genuinely interested in you, he will certainly let you know. How many times have girls dealt with mixed signals and thought, "I think he likes me but I'm just not sure. . ."? If a dude really wants to get to know you, he will make it his business to make it happen. If he's able to contact you (on the phone or whatever) and wants to, he will. And if he's serious about you, he won't play games with your emotions but show you the utmost respect.

5) There's more to being a[n intriguing] lady than just how you look. While your appearance is one of the first things that a guy will notice about you, your personality is important too. It never hurts to smile :-). While he and I were definitely physically attracted to each other, intellect played a big role in our desire to get to know one other. He said that he appreciated my high mental capacity (lol). Let guys know that there's more to you than a pretty face or a nice body.

6) There's hope- decent guys are still around. . . and it's good to know what you want. Although he and I didn't work out, he reminded me that there are still some guys who are honest and respectful. While he embodied some of the qualities that I'd appreciate in a boyfriend or husband, he also made me think about what I would prefer. He said he'd never met a woman like me and I'd never met a guy quite like him. . . but I do believe that there are more out there.

I just want to encourage you, ladies to. . . BE YOURSELF! LOVE YOURSELF! *Guard your heart* but give love a chance. . . You'll learn plenty of lessons through life and some of the greatest [ones] may even come from strangers.